God's Imperfect Gifts
Buttons
When we read theology, we read about God's perfection, with terms like all-knowing, all goodness, all perfection. If this is true, then why are God's gift's so all-flawed?
This brings a memory to me of Buttons, my cat. He came as an answer to prayer—my gift from God.
This is what happened.
I'd transferred to a new monastery and felt lonely and homesick. I prayed I would "see" a kitty. Instead, I found one abandoned by its mother, curled up in the leaves. He was about 4 weeks old, scrawny, flea-ridden, and needing attention. I kept him, considering him my gift from God.
But this gift was not perfect. He was not the sweet, cuddly kitten I wanted. He retained his wild streak as a feral, which he unleashed on me when I least expected it. He was fussy about his food and easily upset if he didn’t get his way. And he used to wake me up early, really early.
One time I looked at this "gift from God" and wondered why my gift had to be so imperfect? If God is so perfect, why can't God's gifts be perfect too?
And then I thought, perhaps it is my concept that is flawed. Perhaps my flawed thinking comes from the human experience. Ever ask someone for help and have them take over? Like, since you asked, somehow you are deficient, and they must do it themselves. Ask, and you will be controlled.
Perhaps the gift is imperfect because God is not like that. When you ask God for a gift, God does not take over or treat us like we cannot handle life. Instead, God gives us what is very fallible. Because God knows we can handle it. We can take those gifts and figure it out. God does not need to take over our lives and treat us like idiots. God has greater respect for us than that.
So, when I remember Buttons, I remember the good as well as the difficult. I remember how I had him for 14 years. I remember how I would find him waiting for me at the door every time I came home. I remember how he loved to sleep on my feet, nap in whatever room I settled in, and would talk to me. I remember him with fondness because, despite his flaws, he was truly my gift from God.
When I receive an imperfect gift now, I want to remember, I can handle it. Truly I can.
But this gift was not perfect. He was not the sweet, cuddly kitten I wanted. He retained his wild streak as a feral, which he unleashed on me when I least expected it. He was fussy about his food and easily upset if he didn’t get his way. And he used to wake me up early, really early.
One time I looked at this "gift from God" and wondered why my gift had to be so imperfect? If God is so perfect, why can't God's gifts be perfect too?
And then I thought, perhaps it is my concept that is flawed. Perhaps my flawed thinking comes from the human experience. Ever ask someone for help and have them take over? Like, since you asked, somehow you are deficient, and they must do it themselves. Ask, and you will be controlled.
Perhaps the gift is imperfect because God is not like that. When you ask God for a gift, God does not take over or treat us like we cannot handle life. Instead, God gives us what is very fallible. Because God knows we can handle it. We can take those gifts and figure it out. God does not need to take over our lives and treat us like idiots. God has greater respect for us than that.
So, when I remember Buttons, I remember the good as well as the difficult. I remember how I had him for 14 years. I remember how I would find him waiting for me at the door every time I came home. I remember how he loved to sleep on my feet, nap in whatever room I settled in, and would talk to me. I remember him with fondness because, despite his flaws, he was truly my gift from God.
When I receive an imperfect gift now, I want to remember, I can handle it. Truly I can.
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